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30 December 2015

HOW I ENDED UP BEING SOMEONE ELSE

hello y'all.

i am super very sorry it took me this long to finally write a new article but i've been busy doing all the christmas stuff as visiting my family and relatives. and eating. oh and maybe i was a little bit lazy too. okay. i was just avoiding writing it because i am a lazy ass piece of shit but now when i got to it. let's go.

sooner this school year. i found myself talking to some people i didn't even want to talk to. but a lot had changed in my circle of friends before, so i was (don't wanna say forced) forced to start talking to people i would have never started talking to if it was my owm decision. so. my friends started hanging out with some people. and because they are my friends they invited me many times to go hang out with them too. but. i don't know if it's just me but when it comes to a group conversation i like to join a lot. (i just like speaking in general, i guess) so i start talking about things those people could be interested in and stuff. but these "friends" didn't seem to enjoy my presence very much, neither did they enjoy me talking, so i kind of quitted this habit of mine and started not to voice my thoughts so much.  i even started to find cool the things they did and laughed at things they said even thoug they were unfunnier than my grandma when she's joking. i guessed i was just doing it because i felt odd and wanted to fit in somehow.

i soon got bored of it and stopped spending time with these people at all. and even meeting my friends because they were hanging out with them so often.
i didn't notice how much have things changed until this holliday when i spent hours coloring and watching movies (so not me) and crying over them. (me af)

i've been feeling very sad and lonely. literally nobody contacted me to hang out with them and i was just spending my stupid life by myself.

but yesterday i called one of my friends and had a long chat with them. we set up a meeting time and spent a day at home just doing silly things such as watching kylie jenner lip challenges going wrong and other stuff. then our other friend called to go hang out with her and her boyfriend. and we met up at a pub near. it was awesome. i had decided not to wanna fit in so bad and just simply stay myself. and i did. and it made so very happy.

people even seemed to like what i'm saying and i wasn't the fool for once.
so what i wanna say is to stay yourself, no matter how weird you are. people appear to like it more than when you're trying to fit in desperately.
an original is worth more than a copy.
gretavbc.


PLEASE LET ME KNOW IF YOU HAVE ANY SIMILAR EXPERIENCES. I'D LOVE TO HEAR FROM YOU.
greta.vrabcova@seznam.cz

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